Saturday, September 12, 2015


8th Grade Boy Charged with Sexual Assault for Kissing Classmate

A friend sent me a link to this story today on Facebook.
She was really upset that people were "excusing" his behavior as a childish act, when it was clearly a case of sexual assault and taken seriously. As a Mom of 2 boys, and a grandmother of three, I responded. We're usually on track _______________, but with a 13 year old kid, prosecution may be a bit of overkill. "No one was injured during the incident, police say," At 18, old enough to know better? prosecute his butt. At 13? Since it happened on school property, perhaps this could be effectivelly handled in other ways. I'm a mother and grandmother....I had two of the best kids on the planet, BUT KIDS DO STUPIDLY IMMATURE THINGS .....BECAUSE THEY ARE KIDS. If no one was hurt, it deserves apologies and discipline, education and maybe some community service to teach him and his friends why what they did was wrong, not a juvenile record and time in juvie. Ever seen what happens in there?

Her resonse to me 
It frustrates me that when 13 year olds murder other people, the public comes running with torches and pitchforks to try them as adults. When 18 year olds murder they are sentenced to death and everyone says they are adults and should know better.......13 is an average age for people to be conscious of sexuality and personal space. But when a 14 year old girl is sexually assaulted people come to the boy's defense and says it is just boyish fun. It isn't.
The girl clearly is upset about this and she shouldn't be robbed of justice or invalidated because other people do stupid things too.  Survivors of sexual assault are afraid to come forward because people won't put the blame on the perpetrator.
I wanted to take a bit more space and time to understand and validate her feelings, but still respond from my vantage point. a few decades further down the road.

I hear what you are saying, And I appreciate your sentiments, but the world is not always as black and white as we'd wish it to be. The current environment is the only one you've had the opportunity to observe firsthand. I was a kid. . Then I became a Mom, and now I have a nearly 15 year old grandson. I just think about the hypersexualization of children today-- in dress, in attitudes, in behavior-- all of which parents support, willingly or unwillingly, by means of their acceptance. Today, the line between kids and adults is blurred-- and not in a good way. 8 year olds have smartphones and instagram accounts, and are posting things to the internet they do not have the maturity to understand. 7 year olds deescribe themselves as transgender--- I didn't know I HAD a gender at 7, or that gender identity could BE different from physical anatomy. Sure, there were girls in my school who preferred never to wear dresses and liked playing football more than Barbies, but that was perfectly OK-- it didn't make you not a girl, it made you a girl who liked football. Your mother probably got a little annoyed around Easter when she wanted you to put on the pretty pastel dress, but no one was signing you up for hormone treatments and/or surgery. The boys in our neighborhood chased us on our bikes, but we didn't charge them with sexual harassment or assault. .

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